Hey Lovelies,
Let’s talk about boobs! Tits. Ta-tas. You know, the fleshy mounds on female’s bodies that can make milk for an infant. I talked about how the start to breastfeeding was anything but easy for me. It ligit did not feel natural. My body was fumbling through the motions. My baby was fumbling through the motions. It was a cluster, leaving him frustrated and hungry and me emotional and discouraged.
No good.
“It will get easier”, everyone said. All the really, real breastfeeding posts on Facebook, and my lactation consultant, all sang the same tune.
And it did. It got easier.
But that process, of figuring out the cluster and it getting easier, took 6 months.
6 months can feel like a long ass time. I’m glad that I stuck it out, and am still exclusively breastfeeding, but I completely understand why someone would not do this. Any time in the previous 6 months could have felt like the perfect time to throw in the towel. Honestly.
But now? Now I find myself thinking that I get how people breastfeed up to a year… or longer. I used to have 6 months as my imaginary line in the sand. It’s what most breastfeeding Nazis, er… advocates, will say is the minimum threshold for “best for your baby”. I would have said that I wanted to do it for 6 months and maybe up to a year. At first that was insurmountable.
But now? I can see it.
Maybe the fact that I crossed my imaginary line now has something to do with my renewed commitment to doing this longer. Maybe it has to do with the fact that the Bean Sprout can drain me in 10-15 min, both sides, and so it doesn’t take up the majority of my day anymore. Maybe it’s because let down no longer feels like daggers of god damned fire every time it happens.
Really who knows why, all of the above, none of it… who cares!
I’m just glad I feel ready and able to continue feeding by breast for the time being. At the very least, it gives them a good use now that they are no longer needed to entice hubby into baby making. So, huzzah!
I love re-purposing things.
😉 ,
The Chicken
It’s always good to see these posts from women on the other side of the struggle to breastfeed. Not for the “see, you just need to keep doing it” but for the acknowledgement that it usually is a lot harder than most people acknowledge. And that Lactation consultants need to be much more active with helping new, inexperienced mothers.
Gypsy Mama had a great post about a woman at her breastfeeding support group who wasn’t able to breastfeed. The consult promoted her still giving her child time to her breasts solely as a way to bond. That the focus shouldn’t be solely about feeding. It really rang true with her, as we were doing so much skin-to-skin with the Beats when they were newborns, focusing on the contact while I pumped and they were bottle feed. Breastfeeding did become the focus, but it required help and a lot more time than most were willing to admit.
I’m glad you’re on this side. And thank you for sharing your story and talking openly about how fucking hard it was for all of you. Because in this time of Breastfeeding Nazis, these truths need to be shared so those who are unable to breastfeed aren’t being shamed.
I agree with Cristy – your honesty is appreciated.
I’m glad that things finally got easier for you.
Cyn,
Thanks
XOXXO, The Chicken
Cristy,
The Breastfeeding Nazis are so much to handle. Thanks for liking my honesty.
XOXXO, The Chicken
Im breastfeeding 2.5 week old twins. While I haven’t had to deal with much pain, i feed as much as 16 times a day. I look forward to it not taking up my whole life at some point 🙂
Emma,
Good luck! I can’t imagine the strain of nursing two! It will get easier. Strength until then!!
XOXXO, The Chicken.
Glad it got easier!
Mel,
Me too.
XOXXO, The Chicken
I only made it to 5 months, so good on you, homegirl! With working and travelling as much as I do, I just could not keep up. Plus my 8 month old son is a total hoss and weighs 24 pounds. 🙂
Kim,
Holy, go man go!
XOXXO, The Chicken