I was musing the other day about how I am moving forward in my journey. How things are shifting and changing. Because after 3 years TTC I got my first ever BFP– through IVF. So, now what? What does this mean about who I am in this community? I LIKE who I’ve become, who I am when I help others struggling with this condition. I want to advocate. I want to support you. However, is that still possible? Can I maintain that? Can I still be helpful here?
I want to think- Yes. I want to try.
The infertility community has been a saving grace for so many, including me. All the diverse stories and diagnosis’ are necessary in this space. No matter why you’re infertile you’re heard, understood. I believe this includes the so called “success stories”. I know that can be hard. Hearing of a person’s pregnancy, even an IF friend who gets it, can be a knife to the heart. But there is still value. Because those stories, of people achieving pregnancy and then parenthood, allow hope to enter this space. This is a dark space and there’s so much pain. I know that the pain is necessary, but so is its counterpoint- hope. Without it it’s easy to forget, in our darkest hour, why we’re walking this path. Why do we walk forward?
I want to offer that hope and hold your hand while you struggle. I want to assure you that I remember. Our stories may not be the same, but this pain is something I have lived through.
When it hurts know that there is light. For some, it’s true, that may not come from parenthood, although we all hope for that ending. Yet, even without achieving parenthood there can be periods of light! Even when you are still in active treatment! And I want to remind you of that, too. Will you let me help you walk forward?
And then, reach out!
Be that spark of light to someone else, too.
Allow your light to shine brightly. Your story.
Allow others to be that spark for you.
Even success stories. Even me… As I journey further into my pregnancy I humbly ask that you allow me to continue to walk with you. We all need help walking forward. You are not alone. Let’s do this, together.