I feel like Rose from the movie Titanic. You know, where she says “Outwardly, I was everything a well brought up girl should be. Inside, I was screaming.” All while she demurely boards the boat?
I feel like that. It’s like I’m caught in this space that I don’t want to be in but don’t know how to get out of. I’ve been able to keep a good face on lately, but on the inside it’s like a hysterical, never ending scream. IVF is fast approaching and I’m falling apart. I feel like my brain’s exploding but I’m unsure what to do about it. I don’t even know how to properly categorize all these emotions.
I don’t know how to react… So I just sit. Silent. Looking normal. While inside, I quietly fall apart.